Do You Take Your Employer to be Your Loyal, Committed Partner? I do.

With love in the air this month, many have been focused on their personal relationships. Whether with loved ones, family or friends, people have been spending a little extra time making sure their partners feel special. This extra attention fosters a healthy relationship where both parties are committed to one another.

While it seems obvious that we need to renew our commitment to our personal relationships, oftentimes it is not as apparent in the workplace. Considering the amount of time we personally invest in our careers, it is more important than ever to build a positive working relationship with our employer, boss, and co-workers.

Take a moment and reflect. How is your relationship with your employer? Do you remember what was promised to you when you received your offer letter? Do you recall the excitement you had your first day, month, year of work?

Each of us owns the attitude we will have about our job and how we will contribute to the health of our work relationship. Just like marriage, we have to work in partnership to create a positive and functional employee-employer relationship as well. To renew your vows with your employer, consider the following:

What do you like most about your job? Really figure out what you are passionate about and make sure it is a part of your regular job content/responsibilities. Without passion, it is unlikely that you will take pride in your work and leave with a sense of accomplishment. Knowing what you love about your work will increase your desire to come to work and help you stay focused on the impact of your efforts.

What frustrates you at work? Identifying what de-motivates you can help you isolate and prioritize areas for improvement. Once you have an understanding of your work engagement gaps, you can focus on possible solutions.

How is your relationship with management (both your boss and senior leadership)? Make sure you evaluate the lines of communication with management and whether those relationships are built on respect and trust. If your relationship with management is suffering, most likely you feel underappreciated, seldom recognized and lost as it relates to your career path. What would make your relationship with management better?

How is your relationship with your co-workers? Do you have co-workers that motivate you to do your best work, support you and encourage you to take on new challenges? Or, do you overindulge in office gossip with your colleagues and get caught in a downward spiral? Remove yourself from any toxic co-worker relationships that will inhibit your ability to think positively about work. Focus on building a community that serves as a support system. Who do you see as a part of that community?

Do you appreciate what your employer does for you? Many of us take certain benefits for granted. If your employer goes out of the way to upgrade its benefits plan or institutes a new training program, take the time to thank management for workplace improvements. If no one notices that progress is occurring, management can also begin to feel that their efforts are unnoticed and not appreciated.

After reflecting on your employer relationship, put it in writing. Your thoughts are only good if you act on them. Those who write out their goals achieve significantly more than those who do not write their goals¹.

Make a list of discussion points to share with your boss (i.e., an action plan). If you do not feel comfortable talking to your boss, consider having a conversation with your boss' superior or your HR Department. Make sure the discussion points are actionable, not a gripe session. The discussion should be focused on open-sharing such that you can better understand one another, as well as build a more effective working relationship. From there, set-up monthly or quarterly conversations to talk about what engages you and what could help you become more engaged.

Start the New Year fresh by pro-actively seeking a healthy work relationship with your employer. Do not put your own happiness off to the side; renew your vows today.

¹ Research from Gail Matthews Written Goal Study Dominican University